chapter 15

 

 

The bridge crew watched the main viewer anxiously, waiting for their first good look at the mystery ship. Seven had reported it on long range sensors the previous day, and Harry had then detected a communications buoy set near the ship. Its message had prompted a senior staff meeting. The ship was obviously not moving and had sustained damage, but the buoy was not a distress call. It was a warning that the ship was under medical quarantine and should not be approached. All attempts at contact had gone unanswered.

The consensus at the staff meeting was unanimous. Despite the fact that the quarantined crew had neither asked for assistance nor returned their hails, they would approach and offer what aid they could. Unsurprisingly, Revi in particular had been adamant about their obligation to assist, even in the absence of a distress call. “There could be any number of reasons why they haven’t put out a distress call,” she said. “They may not be able to.”

“Or it could be a trap,” said Chakotay.

“Unlikely,” Tuvok said. “Most traps do not warn potential victims to stay away.”

Even at warp seven point five it had taken nearly twenty hours to reach the ship, and they came out of warp right next to the warning buoy. Their view of the ship confirmed its damage; it had obviously been through a fight and come out on the wrong end.

“Mr. Kim, try another hail,” said Janeway. And this time, perhaps because of the short range, it worked.

“They’re answering, Captain.”

“Put it on.”

A short, bald humanoid appeared on screen. “Please do not attack,” he said nervously. “We wish only to die in peace.”

“I’m Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation starship Voyager,” said Janeway. “We are not here to harm you. If you’re willing, we’d like to offer medical assistance.”

The alien bowed his head. “I thank you for your peaceful intentions, but you would be wise to obey the warning buoy. We are beyond any aid, and if the Visconi find you here they will not be pleased.”

“Who are the Visconi?”

The alien looked up again. “You are not from this area.”

“No. We’re a long way from home. Perhaps you can tell us what’s happening in this region.”

What was happening, it turned out, was that they’d entered a war zone.

 

 

-----

 

 

B’Elanna looked up when the transporter doors opened. Doctor Sandovhar was on time and ready, a good start to their first away mission together.

“Good afternoon, Lieutenant Torres. Ready for some reassembly?”

“Reassembly?”

“Sure. You do the engines, I’ll do the bodies.”

“You’re not much for formality, are you, Doctor?” asked B’Elanna as they stepped up to the transporter pad.

“Nope. Had enough of it to last more than a lifetime. Now I revel in human informality.” Sandovhar smiled at her before looking back at the operator’s console. “Energize.”

A moment later the transporter room faded away, to be replaced with a much darker, much more disorganized room that appeared to pass for a bridge.

Two of the aliens, which they now knew were called Arnett, were waiting for them. Like the rest of their shipmates, they were short, bald and covered in spots. Except the spots weren’t natural, according to the information they’d received during earlier communications. The people aboard this ship were refugees from a war that was raging in this sector, and had been attacked by the Visconi, an aggressive species currently attempting a total takeover of the sector. The Visconi apparently used a combination of energy and biological weaponry—and the spots were the dismal evidence of their work. The ship was reparable, but the Arnett were dying.

As the room solidified, B’Elanna could see the Arnett edging away from them. Given what they’d experienced, she could understand a certain amount of caution. But before she could greet their hosts, one of them raised a shaking arm and pointed a clawlike hand at Sandovhar.

“Siglis preserve us! They’ve sent a Borg to end our misery!”

B’Elanna frowned, looking first at the Arnett and then at Sandovhar, who had gone very still.

“Oh, for Kahless’ sake,” she snapped. “That’s Doctor Sandovhar, and she’s no more Borg than you or I. She’s here to help.”

Sandovhar found her voice. “I’m sorry if my appearance disturbs you,” she said evenly. “My name is Doctor Revi Sandovhar, and I’m the Chief Medical Officer of Voyager. I’ve studied the records you sent over, and I believe I can cure your plague.”

The Arnett lowered his arm. “But you…you are not Borg?”

“I escaped from the Borg,” said Sandovhar. “I’m not one of them.”

He came closer, peering up at her. Sandovhar wasn’t a tall woman, but she towered over this man by a good seven centimeters. “No,” he said after a careful study, which she bore in silence. “I can see you are not. Please forgive my foolish error. We have been through much, and are not inclined to trust.” He held out his hand, which had two fused fingers and an opposable digit. “I am Tuness, first healer of the New Hope. If you will come with me, I’ll take you to our medical unit.”

Sandovhar looked at B’Elanna. “Good luck with the engines,” she said.

B’Elanna nodded. “You too. I mean, good luck with your work.”

“Don’t need it,” said Sandovhar, indicating her host. “The Arnett already did all the hard work. I’m just doing cleanup.”

Tuness bobbed his head and led Sandovhar out of the room, while B’Elanna looked after them in some surprise. That was a different attitude than she was used to from a doctor. Between this and the unforgettable night in Sandrine’s, when Sandovhar had beaten the pants off Captain Janeway, she was realizing that there was more to their CMO than met the eye.

The remaining Arnett stepped forward importantly. “I am Dunott, first engineer,” he said. “Please accept our greatest thanks for your assistance. Even if you cannot repair our engines, we are grateful to you for your kindness.”

“You’re welcome,” said B’Elanna, who hated these inevitable meet-and-greet moments and just wanted to get on with it. “It’s part of our mission to offer assistance to those in need. If you’ll show me to your engine room, I can assess the damage and see what needs to be done.”

“Of course,” said Dunott. “If you will follow me?” He turned and led B’Elanna to a door in the opposite wall of that which Sandovhar and her escort had departed through. They stepped through into a cramped corridor, and B’Elanna gave a moment of thanks that they’d designed their ship with high ceilings. As it was, the top of her head was only a few centimeters from the ceiling. She thought about Lynne, Seven or Tuvok trying to walk through here and had to stifle a snicker. They’d be bent over like crones.

She followed Dunott through a long, twisting series of corridors, finally ending in front of a pair of doors that opened vertically. She hated that kind of mechanism; it always made her think of a guillotine. When she stepped through it, she found herself in a cramped engine room that was plainly designed for small people with small hands. If she needed any assistance on this project, she’d have to rule out at least four of her staff right off the bat. They’d never fit.

She turned to Dunott. Standard protocol dictated that she explain what she was going to do before doing it. She was, after all, a guest on this ship.

“I’m going to scan your engines,” she said. “It’s part of the damage assessment process.” Dunott nodded and watched in fascination as she pulled out her engineering tricorder, immediately noting the dangerously unstable magnetic constrictors. Within five minutes she knew that there were several hours of work here, but it could be done. Folding the tricorder, she turned back to an expectant Dunott. “We can repair your engines,” she said. “It will take some time, however, and I’ll need to bring two additional staff as well as supplies.”

Dunott stared at her silently before apparently realizing that she was politely asking his permission. “Of course!” he said. “Please, bring whatever you need.”

She nodded and tapped her communicator. “Torres to Voyager.”

“What’s the verdict, Lieutenant?” Janeway asked.

“We’re looking at six hours with two more staff to repair the engines,” she said. “But I don’t foresee any problems.”

“Excellent. Dr. Sandovhar reports that she expects to have a medical solution in another three hours, so it looks like we’ll have the New Hope back on course in no time. Bring over whatever and whoever you need, and give me hourly updates.”

“Acknowledged,” she said. “Torres out.” Three hours? Sandovhar worked fast. There had been some mutterings when Janeway had announced her promotion, but it was plainly obvious that this woman knew what she was doing. The Doctor hadn’t been happy about his demotion, and had advertised that fact to whomever would listen, but B’Elanna was secretly happy to have a replacement for him. She’d repaired the Doctor’s holomatrix and programming files enough times to know just how fine the line was between a working doctor and a useful but static collection of medical files. Besides, Sandovhar didn’t seem to share the Doctor’s sarcastic personality, or his god complex.

Dunott was looking at her in wonderment. “Your doctor can cure us?”

“If she says she can, then she can,” said B’Elanna.

“And you can get us moving again in only six hours?”

“Yes,” she said. “You took some bad hits, but none of the damage is permanent.”

He seemed to be overwhelmed. “We will be grateful to you until Siglis returns for us,” he began, and B’Elanna knew he was starting in on some long-winded profession of appreciation. She cut him short.

“We’re happy to help out,” she said. “And the sooner I get started, the sooner you’ll be up and running. If you don’t mind, I need to start bringing over some staff.”

“Of course,” he said, showing no signs of moving, and B’Elanna stifled a sigh. It was going to get really crowded in here.

 

 

-----

 

 

Janeway sat in her chair, watching the unchanging scene on the main view screen. Both B’Elanna and Revi had reported in, and everything was moving right along; ahead of schedule, even. So far the away mission was an unqualified success. She just hoped they could wrap up and move out before any Visconi ships detected them, since defending both themselves and a crippled ship wasn’t anything she had on her To Do list today.

“Sandovhar to Voyager.”

“Go ahead, Doctor,” said Janeway.

“I have the biological samples I need, Captain. One to beam back, directly to sickbay.”

“Acknowledged.” Janeway nodded at Harry Kim to initialize the transport. “Chakotay, I’m going to sickbay. You have the bridge.”

She found Revi and the Doctor both huddled over a microscope. “That configuration won’t work,” the Doctor was saying. “We need to resequence the proteins.”

“The configuration is wrong,” agreed Revi, “but the proteins aren’t the problem.”

“How’s it going?” asked Janeway.

“We’re working on adapting a cure to the physiology of the Arnett,” said Revi, straightening up. “It should be fairly straightforward.”

“Once we resequence the proteins,” added the Doctor.

“The proteins are exactly what they should be,” said Revi evenly. “I don’t waste time fixing what isn’t broken, Doctor.”

“I disagree. If you would look—”

“Doctor,” interrupted Revi, “if you would look a little more closely at the reaction, you’d see that it’s the oxidizing agent that’s holding up the process.”

Grumbling to himself, the Doctor sat down and pulled up the image on the scope. Revi smiled at Janeway. “Nice to see a friendly face in sickbay, Captain,” she said.

Her meaning wasn’t lost on Janeway, but Revi was in charge here. Unless she specifically asked for help with her staff, she was on her own.

“Nothing’s happening on the bridge, so I thought I’d go to where the action was,” said Janeway.

“Well, there’s no action here, Captain,” the Doctor observed acidly. “And there won’t be until our CMO listens for a change instead of dictating.” His emphasis on Revi’s title couldn’t be missed.

“Doctor, you might want to watch the insubordinate comments with the captain in the room,” said Revi mildly. “I’ve given you a certain amount of leeway, but I can’t speak for the captain’s tolerance.”

“The captain’s tolerance is running pretty thin,” said Janeway, who was, in fact, startled by the Doctor’s overt lack of respect. “Doctor Sandovhar, may I speak with you privately?”

“Certainly.” Revi led them to the CMO’s office and closed the door. “What can I do for you, Kathryn?”

“You can explain to me just how long you plan to put up with that crap,” said Janeway bluntly. “You’re fostering insubordination, Revi. You need to put a stop to it now, before it gets any more out of hand.”

Revi sighed. “I know it sounds bad, but it’s under control.”

“Is it? Because you’re right, it does sound bad. Revi, I know you’re sympathetic to his situation, but that doesn’t mean you should rescind all protocols of discipline and respect.”

“I’m not. If it gets much worse, I’m prepared to step on him hard enough to make him two-dimensional. But that’s the worst thing I could do right now, and I’m hoping to avoid it. I can’t force the Doctor to respect me, even though my rank should command it. I need to earn his respect through decisive, undeniable professional competence—and I’m about to.”

“What do you mean?”

“Right about now, the Doctor is finding that he’s wrong, and I’m right. That’s going to shake him up a bit. What I’m going to propose next should seal the deal.”

Janeway regarded her CMO thoughtfully. “You have something up your sleeve.”

Revi nodded. “This plague is exactly what I’ve been waiting for. As horrified as I am by the reality of a biogenic weapon, I have to admit that it’s providing me with the tool I needed to clear the air in sickbay. Want to watch?”

“How long will it take?”

“About twenty minutes.”

Janeway considered. Nothing was likely to happen on the bridge in the next twenty minutes, and she had to admit to curiosity regarding what Revi had planned. “All right,” she said. “Let’s start the show.”

They exited the office to find the Doctor looking uncomfortable.

“Well, Doctor?” asked Revi. “What did you find?”

“The oxidizing agent is the limiting factor,” he admitted. “It became clear once I looked for it. What I don’t understand is how you knew to look for it. Of all the hindrances I could think of, that was fifth or sixth on the list.”

“Call it instinct,” said Revi offhandedly, and Janeway saw the Doctor wince. As a hologram, instinct was one thing he didn’t have. Finely tuned logical connections, yes, but not instinct.

“I have a proposition for you, Doctor,” Revi continued. “You seem to have very strong opinions regarding how to proceed with the synthesis of this repairing agent. I have equally strong opinions, and at the moment we’re just getting in each other’s way. So I propose that we each work separately.”

“That seems a waste of resources,” said the Doctor smugly. “Duplication is supposed to come after the proof, not before.”

“Are you afraid to work on your own, Doctor?”

“That’s absurd.”

“Then convince me. Prove to me that you can develop a repairing agent faster than I can.”

“This is a waste of everyone’s time,” said the Doctor, moving out from behind the scope and walking right into Revi’s personal space. Janeway wondered idly if he’d learned that from her. “I’m a hologram, with the entire medical database of the Federation at my disposal. You’re human. There’s simply no way you can compete. No offense meant, of course.” He smiled at Janeway, but she knew he most certainly did intend offense.

“I think it’s an excellent idea,” she said, having guessed what Revi had in store for the Doctor. After her own humiliation at the pool table two months ago, she could recognize the signs. Revi was setting up a hustle. “In fact, I’m ordering you to take part, Doctor. The race begins now, and I’ll referee.”

The Doctor stared at her. “Captain, you can’t possibly—”

“Now, Doctor. You’d better get moving or Doctor Sandovhar will get a head start.” Indeed, Revi had already walked to the tray of biological samples and was pulling out vials.

With a disbelieving look, the Doctor threw his hands up theatrically and stalked to the tray. “Fine,” he huffed, pulling out samples. “If I’m ordered to take part in a farce, I’ll take part in a farce. What do I care about wasted time, it’s not my cells degrading even as we speak. I’m sure the Arnett will appreciate that we’re utilizing our most efficient methods to save their lives…”

“Doctor?” Janeway called out. “From this point on, the race will be conducted in silence.”

With a final loud sigh, the Doctor acquiesced. Just in time, Janeway thought; if she’d had to listen to much more of this she’d be asking Revi for a headache hypo. Taking a seat at the nearest terminal, she uploaded the astrometrics chart she’d been reading on the bridge. She never was much good at just standing around, even if it was for only twenty minutes. She smiled to herself at the thought. Twenty minutes, Revi? You told me three hours.

As it turned out, Revi had underestimated the time required. It took twenty-three minutes before she straightened up and announced, “I’m done.”

The Doctor wheeled around from his station, his face a mask of disbelief. “That’s impossible!”

“See for yourself. Put a fresh biosample on the scope.”

The Doctor stared at her.

“Doctor,” said Revi quietly, and this time Janeway heard the voice of command. “Put a fresh biosample on the scope, now.”

The Doctor did as ordered, and Janeway walked around behind them to get a view of the scope’s screen. Revi moved aside and subtly encouraged her to get closer.

“What you’re looking at, Captain, is an enzyme called anhydroxyfalinase. Its job is to catalyze the reaction of two separate byproducts that result when the cell processes nutrients.” Revi reached out and touched a pad on the controls. “Now I’m introducing a few new molecules into the picture—the byproducts that are supposed to react with the enzyme. This process takes place at a rate of several million reactions per second, so the scope is set to display at a speed that we can actually see. Watch what happens.”

Janeway watched the molecules float lazily toward the enzyme. One brushed against it and kept on going.

“They didn’t bond,” she said.

“Exactly right. The enzyme has been damaged, and the reactants don’t recognize it. Under normal circumstances these byproducts are harmless, but since the enzyme isn’t bonding with them, the cell can’t neutralize them and flush them out. They’re building up to toxic levels, and it’s resulting in a total systemic failure. Very clever as a manufactured weapon, since it affects not just muscle or skeletal or specific organ cells, but every single cell in the body.”

“So how will you fix it?”

Revi flashed her a smile. “With a little molecular engineering. Everything I’ve shown you so far is what the Arnett had already figured out. Diagnosis at the molecular level is the time-consuming part; but they don’t have the medical know-how to engineer a solution. The challenge was to create a new molecule that will dock with enzyme and alter its shape to one that the reactants can recognize. And the docking must be both seamless and permanent.”

She took a vial from her tray and inserted it into the scope. A press of a control pad introduced her repairing agent into the biosample, and Janeway watched in fascination as a group of odd-shaped molecules floated into the picture, one of them heading straight for the enzyme. As soon as it made contact, the two molecules bonded. Seconds later, one of the original reactants brushed against the newly repaired enzyme and locked in, leaving a space open on the enzyme that was obviously designed for the other reactant. Sure enough, another, differently-shaped molecule wandered by and was captured. Immediately the two reactants bonded to each other and were released by the enzyme, floating away as another reactant came along and locked itself in. Revi touched a control and the action sped up, showing the enzyme bonding reactants and releasing them, one after another, in an endless procession.

“Looks like it’s holding,” she said. “We’ll let it run for a few billion reactions to make sure.”

The Doctor straightened up. “If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I would never have credited it,” he said slowly. “How did you engineer that molecule so quickly?”

“I admit to a slight advantage, Doctor.”

Janeway kept her smile to herself, but only barely. Yep, it was a hustle.

“Well?” the Doctor asked acidly. “Are you going to share your little advantage?”

“I’m ex-Borg.”

“What does that—”

“Think about it. You’ve doubted my qualifications from the beginning because you didn’t think a human doctor could compete with a holographic one. But you keep forgetting I’m not entirely human anymore. You may have access to the Federation’s entire medical database, but I have access to that and a lot more. Specifically, eight thousand, three hundred and seventy-nine more species’ worth of information. And the Arnett are one of them. I recognized the enzyme involved in this and knew exactly which proteins were required to repair it. That was my advantage in this race, and it will continue to be my advantage for just about every species we will ever work with between here and the Alpha Quadrant. Can you compete with that, Doctor?”

Janeway looked at Revi in surprise. Her voice had remained calm throughout her explanation, but by the end it had acquired a whip-like edge. For someone who had professed sympathy for the Doctor’s situation, she certainly wasn’t showing it now. Her words had been carefully chosen to flay him open at the point of his greatest pride—his superior knowledge. Which had just become his inferior knowledge.

The Doctor actually sat down. “No,” he said. “I can’t compete with that. Why am I even activated? You don’t need me anymore.”

“Certainly I do,” said Revi. “Stop looking at me as an either-or individual. First you wouldn’t accept me because you thought of me as fully human, and now you’re overestimating my abilities because you’re thinking of me as fully Borg. I’m neither. I have the knowledge of the Borg, but some of the physical limitations of a human. I can’t work nonstop for months on end the way you can. Seventy-two hours is about my limit. I have to eat. I have to regenerate. And I like my down time, too. I don’t want to be in sickbay every waking hour. So I need someone to be here when I can’t, and when there’s too much for one person to do, and sometimes just for the enjoyment of sharing ideas and theories with another highly qualified doctor. That would be you.”

The Doctor looked up again, but Janeway spoke up before he could respond.

“Congratulations,” she said, looking at both doctors. “We have a working repairing agent and a means of saving a lot of lives. Good work, both of you.”

“I didn’t do anything,” muttered the Doctor.

“Are you or are you not a member of Doctor Sandovhar’s staff?” asked Janeway, driving the point home.

“Apparently I am,” the Doctor answered, in a barely audible tone.

“Then you share in the credit. And the next time anything goes wrong in sickbay, Doctor Sandovhar shares in the blame, whether or not she had anything to do with it. That’s how it works, Doctor.” Without giving him a chance to answer, she turned to Revi. “I need to get back to the bridge. Will you walk with me?” She thought the Doctor could use a little processing time, and she really didn’t want to be here for the fallout.

“Doctor, please begin the duplication process,” said Revi. The Doctor nodded wordlessly.

As soon as the sickbay doors shut behind them, Janeway pulled Revi to the side of the corridor.

“Do you know how many times the Doctor and I have butted heads?” she asked.

“No, but I can imagine.”

“Well, let’s just say that scientific notation was invented so humans could count that high. And I would have given a lot to be able to shut him down, permanently and at the ego level, like you just did. I’m glad I was there to witness it.”

“I am too, though my initial thought was to keep it private to spare the Doctor from a more public humiliation. But his little comment in front of you pretty much sealed his fate. The private insults I could handle, but the public one just pissed me off.”

Janeway grinned. “Remind me never to piss you off. Of course,” she added, “I already got my public humiliation, so maybe I’ve paid in advance.”

Revi looked sheepish. “You know, I never apologized for that. I meant to. At the time it was fun, but I wasn’t thinking about the ramifications of hustling you in front of the crew. It was just—”

“A totally public comeuppance to my own ego, and one I richly deserved,” finished Janeway. “Don’t apologize for it. And keep up the good work in there,” she said, indicating the sickbay. “I do have one question, though.”

“What’s that?”

“Why did you tell me the vaccine was three hours away, when you knew you could whip it out in twenty minutes?”

“Partly to set the Doctor up,” said Revi. “But also partly because I really do need to make sure the repair stays intact. If the connection fails, it’ll happen in the next two hours. So if everything still looks good two and a half hours from now, then we’ve confirmed a winner.”

Janeway nodded. “I’m also a little surprised that the Doctor has apparently never seriously considered your Borg knowledge.”

“Probably because I’ve never brought it up before now,” said Revi. “I didn’t need to; everything we’ve dealt with up to now was within my realm of knowledge from before my assimilation. I was really hoping he’d accept me on my own merits. I was a good doctor long before I acquired my cortical implant.”

“Your records make that abundantly clear. But why would you want to dismiss that knowledge? It’s extremely valuable. It makes you unique.”

“It’s blood knowledge, Kathryn. I have it because billions of people died, both literally and figuratively. It’s not something I’m proud of.”

“I can understand that,” said Janeway. “But you didn’t have any control over how that information was acquired. You do, however, have control over how it’s used from here on out. And an obligation to use it for the greater good.” She reached out and rested her hand on Revi’s cybernetic arm. “I think you made a great start today.”

Revi looked down at her hand, then back into her eyes. “It’s a start,” she agreed.

 

 

 

 

---

Chapter 16

 

 

Voyager slipped through space at warp six, taking the most direct route across the Visconi’s claimed territory. The First of the New Hope, grateful for the assistance to his ship and crew, had provided Janeway with some very helpful charts and advice.

“We will spread the word among the Arnett that you are an ally,” he said, “but when the Visconi find you, you must never admit to having helped us. That will brand you an enemy and they’ll tear you apart. Your ship is impressively armed, Captain, but the Visconi are well armed as well, and there are many more of them. Please be careful.”

Janeway had thanked him for the advice and sent the charts to Seven, who had quickly plotted the most direct course and sent it to the helm. Now they were in a race, hoping to make it through before being detected. Janeway wasn’t afraid of meeting the Visconi, but the idea of having to negotiate with a species capable of manufacturing and using a biogenic weapon was decidedly unappealing. At least the Arnett had a cure now—and the fact that the Visconi were unaware of that gave the Arnett a great advantage.

At 0100 after their first day of transit, Janeway was woken by a call from the bridge. Nine ships had been detected on an intercept vector—it could only be the Visconi. She ordered the senior staff to the bridge.

“Captain,” said Tuvok from his tactical console. “The ships are approaching in a V-formation from behind us.”

“Confirmed,” said Harry. “Moving at warp seven. They’re in pursuit.”

“Armaments, Tuvok?”

“Advanced enough that we would be wise to avoid a fight.”

Janeway nodded, having expected this.

“Captain, they’re hailing us.”

“On screen.”

A rail-thin alien appeared on the main viewer. His face reminded Janeway of a rodent, and when he spoke, his voice carried the tone of an individual accustomed to instant obedience.

“Victory to unidentified ship. You are in Visconi territory. You are ordered to break from warp at once.”

“Bring us to impulse, Mr. Paris,” said Janeway. “Mr. Kim, open a channel.” At Harry’s nod she responded. “I’m Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation starship Voyager. We are merely traveling through this space and seek no conflict.”

“That is well for you,” said the Visconi captain. Moments later the fleet of nine ships came out of warp in a backward V, coasting up to surround Voyager on both sides with the point ship directly behind them. “You are not authorized for transit through our territory,” he continued. “State your intentions.”

“I didn’t realize that authorization was required,” said Janeway evenly. “We’re a long way from home, and are simply taking the fastest route back. We were unaware of any restrictions in this area.”

“Ignorance is no excuse.” He examined her, and she had the impression that she was a particularly interesting museum specimen. “I have not seen your species before. Where are you from?”

“We’re from an area of space thirty-four thousand light years from here.”

He stared at her. “You will return with us to Viscon now.”

Janeway knew from the Arnett’s charts that the Visconi homeworld was a full day’s travel out of their way, and she wasn’t in any hurry to go there. “Is that necessary?” she inquired. “Surely a man leading such a fleet as yours has the power to authorize our passage. We pose no threat and wish only to be on our way.”

“You’re not a threat,” agreed the alien. “Because the moment you make a move in the wrong direction, I will erase your existence. We are transmitting coordinates now. You will proceed to Viscon at warp seven, and we will accompany you in case you get…lost. You can then petition the Viscon Council for authorization to traverse our space. If they agree, you will be allowed to proceed. If not, you will be escorted to our nearest border.”

Which would be the area where they’d entered this space, and going around the Visconi’s claimed territory would take nearly four weeks. Not her idea of a good alternative, and she wasn’t even convinced that the alien captain was telling the truth about that option. Her gut feeling told her that the Visconi might be more likely to eliminate a problem than escort it out of their playground.

“Very well,” she said in a bored tone. “Mr. Kim, do you have the coordinates?”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Then let’s get this show on the road. If our ‘hosts’ are ready.”

“A wise decision,” the alien captain said. “Proceed.”

 

 

-----

 

 

At warp seven, it had taken them fourteen hours to arrive at Viscon, and their nine-ship escort had kept them inside its V formation the entire distance. Janeway had never seen anything quite like it; even the most militaristic cultures she’d encountered wouldn’t have devoted that many warships to a single trespasser. Either the Visconi were the most paranoid species in the quadrant, or they had so many resources that nine warships were easily dispatched for escort duty. Neither possibility boded well.

Once there, they’d been given their marching orders by another, equally rat-faced alien who also declined to identify himself. She was to beam to the provided coordinates to petition to the Council. The only concession she’d managed to wrest had been permission for her personal escort to accompany her; the militaristic Visconi did, at least, understand the need for a bodyguard. Naturally, weapons would not be allowed.

Now she stood on the transporter platform with Lynne, preparing to beam down for a mission that held unknown dangers. It was the first time she’d taken Lynne into a situation that made her nervous; until now their missions had been far more benign.

It still felt a little surreal to see Lynne in her uniform, standing on the next pad over. To her it seemed that no time at all had passed since Lynne had come aboard, out of her element, scared to death and refusing to show it. Now she stood tall and confident, watching her with a calm air and showing no signs of the apprehension that Janeway felt. Whether Lynne was too inexperienced to realize how risky their mission might be, or whether she was showing the results of Tuvok’s mental training, Janeway didn’t know.

“Ready?” she asked.

Lynne nodded. “All set.”

“Energize.”

When the tingling ended, they stood in an enormous hall, with fifteen-meter ceilings and no end in sight in either direction. The sounds of hundreds of people conducting business filled the air, and they were surrounded by orderly rows of aliens who shuffled forward between color-coded lines on the floor. Most of the aliens were Visconi, but she saw at least six other species as well. None of them were Arnett.

“Captain.”

Janeway turned toward Lynne, making the mental adjustment to their current status. When they were on duty and in the presence of others, Lynne called her by her rank. It always took her a moment to adapt.

She followed Lynne’s pointing finger to the floor and saw that they were standing inside a box outlined in red. On one side of the box, two parallel lines broke away and stretched off down the hall. The instruction was obvious.

“I think we’ve beamed into bureaucratic hell,” she said. “Shall we?” Without waiting for an answer, she stepped out of the box and strode along the line. Lynne swung in beside her.

“Captain, don’t you find it curious that we were escorted all the way in here by nine warships and now nobody seems to even care that we’re here?”

“I’m assuming that we’re still under escort. If there aren’t security cams or some equivalent all over this place, I’ll eat my pips.”

Lynne nodded. “Like a casino.”

“Ah, casinos. One of the few constants in the universe.”

“Casinos, or the desire to get something for nothing?” She looked over at Janeway’s snort. “I never spent much time in them, but when I did the security fascinated me. Nobody ever seemed to look up, but the ceilings were always studded with camera ports.”

“Nobody’s looking up here, either, but I don’t think it’s from blissful ignorance.” Janeway recognized the dull, fearful attitude of an oppressed population. She wondered what all of these people were standing in line for.

The lines they were following seemed to keep themselves separate from those hemming in the other aliens, and were entirely empty. Apparently they were in the express lane. After leading them for what felt like a quarter kilometer, the lines made a sharp left turn and ended in front of a closed door. Janeway reached toward the door, only to have it slide soundlessly to one side. Ahead was a small, gray room, empty of any furniture. There was no other exit.

“I don’t like this at all,” murmured Lynne into her ear.

“I don’t either.” Janeway pulled out her tricorder and scanned the room, but could detect no other passageways nor any energy sources within or near the room. Before she could return the tricorder to her belt, a disembodied voice floated from within the room.

“The Council hearing will commence in one minute.”

Still Janeway stood at the threshold, reluctant to enter the box.

“The Council hearing will commence in thirty seconds.” Apparently the whole thing was automated. Janeway made her decision; if these people had wanted them dead, their nine warships could have blown Voyager out of space any time since yesterday afternoon. She took a step toward the doorway, only to feel a hand on her collar holding her back. With a stern look, Lynne slipped past her and entered first. She turned in place and looked at Janeway, who shook her head and stepped inside. Lynne obviously didn’t think a thing about it, but not a single other person on Voyager would have dreamed of grabbing the captain by the collar. The thought made her smile inwardly.

As soon as they entered, the door closed seamlessly behind them. Seconds later, the gray walls of the room seemed to go transparent. Janeway was reasonably certain that they were watching some sort of video transmission, but it felt remarkably like they were standing in the middle of a room, surrounded on all four sides by seated Visconi. There were eight on a side, with no obvious leader.

“You are Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation starship Voyager,” said one. “Your home is thirty-four thousand light years from here.”

“That’s right,” said Janeway, waiting to see what else they knew.

“Your petition is for free passage across our space.”

“Yes.”

Another Visconi spoke up, his voice indistinguishable from the first. “We are interested in your propulsion technology. How did you travel so far?”

Ah. That explained the express lane treatment. “From what I’ve seen of your ships, our propulsion technology is no more advanced than yours. We did not arrive here of our own volition; we were pulled from our home space by an extremely powerful entity. At our current rate of travel, it will take us half of our lifespans to return.”

The Visconi looked at each other, some murmuring in low voices.

“It is unfortunate that so many resources were wasted to bring you here when you have nothing to offer,” said a Visconi seated behind Janeway. She turned to face him.

“Why would you assume I have nothing to offer?” She let the murmuring continue for a few seconds before adding, “In our travels we’ve met many advanced species who have been willing to share their technology with us. We’re willing to share it in turn.”

After a pause, one of them asked, “What kinds of technology?”

The hook was set. Time to reel them in.

 

 

-----

 

 

“Jesus Christ, is that what you were going through all those times you’ve been in treaty negotiations?” Lynne was walking beside her as they made their way back down the red lines.

Janeway rubbed the back of her neck. “Glamorous job, isn’t it?”

“Is it too late to go back to away team rotation?”

“Much too late; you’re stuck with me now.” She smiled at Lynne’s theatrical groan. “You’re the one who wanted this so badly. And just think, that was a short negotiation. The Visconi are very efficient.”

“Four hours is short? What do you call long?”

“Four days.” The even louder groan made her laugh.

“So did you have some sort of bladder extension surgically implanted in command school? Because my teeth are floating, and if we don’t find the Visconi version of a restroom soon I’m going to make an intergalactic scene.”

“We can’t have that.” Janeway completely understood, having a rather full bladder herself, but she’d learned long ago to drink very sparingly prior to and during negotiations. “All of my efforts at establishing friendly relations would go right down the toilet.”

“Oh, that was awful.”

Janeway really wanted to poke Lynne in the gut where she knew it would cause the most distress, but she was supposed to be a mature diplomat and so kept her hands to herself. A moment later she put on her best Captain’s face for the government escort waiting for them in their original beam-in square. Taller than Lynne, with the same rat-faced features that all Visconi seemed to have, he stepped forward with a hand upraised in greeting.

“Well met, Captain Kathryn Janeway. The Visconi Republic is pleased to have an ally from such a distant place. We hope you will enjoy your tour of our capital; we are very proud of our advances.”

“As you should be,” said Janeway smoothly. “From what I’ve already seen, the Visconi are an accomplished people.”

He raised one foot slightly and brought his boot heel down with a click, which Janeway had learned was an acknowledgment of a compliment or a gesture of respect. “If you will come with me?”

As they began walking, Janeway made a tactful request, and their escort immediately changed direction, leading them to an unmarked door and standing respectfully at attention. Lynne opened the door for Janeway, but as soon as they were both inside Lynne bolted past the startled captain and vanished behind a partition. “Thank freaking god,” she moaned in relief, and Janeway laughed.

“You need to learn to drink less, Lynne.”

“Piss off,” said Lynne good naturedly, making Janeway laugh again as she stepped behind her own partition.

“Nice,” she said. “I save your wimpy little bladder from certain containment failure and all you can do is hurl insults.”

“My wimpy little bladder is deeply grateful to you, but the rest of me thinks you’re enjoying this far too much.”

Janeway couldn’t deny that.

The next two hours passed by in a blur of governmental buildings, parks, temples, and military facilities. Janeway ruefully thought to herself that she hadn’t meant to make that good an impression on the Visconi, but the tour was part of the VIP treatment that the Council had accorded her. She found it taxing to pretend admiration for these people and their accomplishments while remembering the Arnett crew that had been attacked, infected, and left to die. At least Lynne seemed to be enjoying herself to some degree. Not that she said a word, but Janeway could read her facial expressions, and it was the expression of wistful longing that inspired her to ask their escort for a departure from the itinerary. They had pulled up in front of a massive open-air market, a stop most likely designed to show off their thriving economy, and Janeway knew that Lynne was wishing she could explore among the brightly colored stalls. A polite request resulted in their guide giving them an hour to look around while he took care of governmental business. He would return to collect them at the entrance, he said, and right before his transport departed he even gave Janeway a handful of Visconi coins to spend.

As they walked into the market, Lynne stopped for a luxurious stretch and sighed happily. “Ahh. Nice to be out of that transport. Though I have to say it’s been totally fascinating. It’s not every day a girl gets a VIP tour of an alien culture.”

“You seem fairly well able to separate your feelings,” said Janeway. “I know what you think about the Visconi, and yet you’re enjoying this.”

“That’s because I don’t think what we saw with the Arnett was necessarily indicative of how the Visconi people feel,” said Lynne. “All through Earth’s history, citizens were usually clueless about their government’s actions. Or helpless to change them, or both. The more repressive or dictatorial the government, the less people were allowed to know. Even the U.S. government did nasty things we didn’t know about, though it usually came out years or decades later. Or else we were fed partial truths designed to win our support for things that nobody would have okayed if they’d known the whole story. And I don’t think that’s limited to past Earth governments, do you?”

Janeway immediately thought of the Federation turning colonies over to the Cardassians, destroying homes and cities, ending generations of terrafarming, and uprooting families for a useless appeasement effort that did not, in the end, prevent the war. She certainly hadn’t agreed with the decision, though she’d been duty-bound to fight the resistance that sprang up because of it.

“Yes,” she said. “Unfortunately. I like to think that the current Earth government, at least, is more open and truthful than in your time, but really there’s no way for me to know for sure. I can say that the ideals of the Federation are diametrically opposed to that kind of deception, but I’m also enough of a realist to know that ideals are not always the only guiding forces.”

“That’s one of the things I love about you,” said Lynne. “Ideals are your guiding forces.”

Janeway wished she could hold her hand. “Thank you,” she said. “Will you still love me if I stumble over an ideal?”

Lynne flashed her a grin. “Absolutely.”

They spent a leisurely half-hour perusing the market stalls before reluctantly turning and beginning their walk back. Lynne was carrying four small packages, courtesy of Janeway’s love of bargaining, and they were comparing the artworks of two different stalls when a small boy bumped into the captain.

“Pardon me,” said Janeway, smiling at the urchin with the smudged face. He glanced at her from under long lashes and scurried off. To Janeway’s complete surprise, however, the child was jerked to a halt by Lynne’s long arm.

“Lynne! What are you doing?”

Lynne stared daggers at the little boy. “Give it back.”

“I don’t have nothing,” he said sullenly.

“Give it back or I’ll take it from you,” she said, her voice hard. “And if I have to do that, I promise you won’t like it.”

Despite her initial impulse to order Lynne to stand down, Janeway let the scene play out. With a scowl, the little boy reached into his dirty coat and pulled out her tricorder. Eyes widening, Janeway took the tricorder and replaced it in her belt pack. She hadn’t felt a thing; this kid was good.

“Can I go now?” the child asked without a trace of apology.

Lynne crouched down to look him in the eye. “As long as I never see you again. And tell whoever’s running you to stay away from us. We’ve got a military transport waiting for us outside; the next kid that tries anything joins us in it. Do you understand?”

The boy nodded and sprinted away the moment Lynne released her grip. She straightened up and looked regretfully at Janeway. “I hate doing that. But being nice to kids like that will just turn you into a target.”

“Did you see him take it?”

“No, but I suspected something as soon as he bumped you. And then I saw your empty belt pack.”

“You sound like you’ve had experience with this sort of thing,” said Janeway as they resumed their walk through the market.

“More than I could wish. Most of the best mountains in the world, I mean on Earth, were located in some of the poorest countries. We’d always fly into the big cities first and then take local transportation from there, so I spent a lot of time in some of the poorest cities on the planet. They’re all full of little kids like that, living on the streets and usually working for someone older. I wanted to save them all when I first started climbing. They live in a whole different world than we do, though, and they don’t respect you for feeling sorry for them. It just turns you into an easy mark.”

Janeway nodded, troubled at the thought of that kind of poverty. “You won’t find them on Earth now. We eliminated homelessness and poverty long ago.”

“I know, you’ve said that before. It’s still hard for me to imagine.”

“Someday I’ll just have to show you, then.” Their hands briefly touched as they made their way under the arching gates of the market.

 

 

-----

 

 

“Welcome back, Captain; Ms. Hamilton,” said Tuvok. Janeway wasn’t surprised to see him waiting for them in the transporter room, despite the fact that it was well into beta shift and he’d gotten as little sleep last night as she had.

“Thanks, Tuvok. It’s good to be back. Seven hours is just about my limit for making nice today.” She led the way into the corridor.

Tuvok raised an eyebrow as he paced beside her. “I assume your negotiations were successful?”

“They were willing to trade in exchange for free passage across their space. It won’t put us out much.”

“I would have been surprised if it had,” said Tuvok. “Your skills as a negotiator are formidable. Are they still bleeding?”

“And people say Vulcans have no sense of humor.” Janeway was always delighted when Tuvok’s particularly dry brand of humor made an appearance.

“Indeed we do not. Do you have anything to report, Ms. Hamilton?” asked Tuvok, turning to Lynne.

“No. It was a routine mission,” said Lynne.

“That’s not true,” said Janeway. “Lynne has now completely proved the necessity of my having a personal security escort. Two months ago she saved me from four groping drunken men, and today she saved me from a small boy.” She smiled at Lynne, but her wife seemed unamused.

“I believe,” said Lynne stiffly, “that what I saved was a piece of Federation technology from falling into the wrong hands.”

Janeway knew she’d put a foot wrong. “True,” she said to Tuvok. “I got pickpocketed at a market. Lynne saw it and caught the kid before he could get away.”

“Good work, Ms. Hamilton.”

“Thank you.” Lynne’s voice was clipped.

“Tuvok, will you deliver this PADD to engineering? As soon as we can get our little trade put together I’d like to get out of here.”

“Certainly, Captain.” Tuvok took the PADD and branched off a side corridor. Janeway called the bridge and updated Chakotay, who’d also pulled a double shift.

“Have the bridge officer call me when we’re ready to go,” she said after giving him the abbreviated version of their negotiations. “I’ll be in my quarters. In the meantime, Chakotay, go get some rest. Janeway out.”

The last words were said as she and Lynne walked into their living room. Without pausing in her stride, Lynne dropped the packages on the couch, stripped off her jacket and stalked into the bedroom. Janeway followed close behind.

“Lynne, I didn’t—” was all she got out before the bedroom door slid shut in her face. Stunned, she stood there blinking for a moment. Damn! She’s really pissed. She put a hand on the door, but instinct warned her not to open it. Instead she went back to the living area and began to untie their packages.

A minute later the door opened and Lynne came out in loose pants and a t-shirt. Without even glancing at Janeway, she went to the replicator and programmed in a cup of tea. Janeway waited, but when Lynne sat at the table with her tea and pulled out a book, she couldn’t stay quiet.

“So you’re not talking to me?” she asked.

“I think it best not to at the moment,” said Lynne coolly, not looking up from her book. “I wouldn’t want to say something I’ll regret.”

Janeway walked over and sat down opposite Lynne. “Like I did, is that what you’re saying? Lynne, I didn’t mean to belittle what you did down there. It was just a joke.”

Finally Lynne met her eyes. “In my experience, most jokes of that sort have some basis in truth.”

“And what truth do you think I’m unconsciously telling you?”

Lynne looked at her for several silent seconds.

“That I’ve been wasting my time,” she said at last. “All these months I’ve been working my ass off, largely in an effort to earn your respect, but I don’t think it worked. I saw a potential physical danger to you in that bar on Laiton; you just saw some drunken groping men. Today I saw a potential loss of Federation technology; you saw a cute little kid.” Her voice was growing louder and more harsh. “Why the hell am I doing this job? You don’t value what I have to offer. Do you even think I can do it? Did you just give it to me because I sleep with you?”

Janeway felt a rush of anger sweep over her, sending all of her diplomatic skills right out the airlock.

“Are you saying you believe I put you in a position I didn’t think you were qualified for? Is that it, Lynne? You think I took you on a potentially hostile mission today because you’re my wife and that relationship earned you a posting? Goddammit!” She slapped her hand on the table and stood up, fuming. “If that’s what you really think, then we’ve got a big problem.” Suddenly she needed some space. “I’m going for a walk.”

She was across the room in a few steps, but wheeled around before the door opened. “You know what? You’re right. All those efforts to earn my respect were a waste of time. Because you already had it, from the first day I met you.” Without waiting for a response, she walked into the corridor.

 

 

-----

 

 

Two hours later, Janeway finished her tour of the ship in her traditional spot, the observation lounge. For years she’d taken regular walks around the ship, alternating between beta and gamma shifts, partially due to her own restlessness and partially to a desire to connect with her crew. Over the last three months her tours had become less frequent as she spent more time at home with Lynne, but that was going to change starting now. Tonight had been a revelation; the crew had greeted her with wide smiles, and many had told her that they were glad to see her. Her walks had been more important to them than she’d realized, and she regretted letting other things take priority. It had been fun to bury herself in her new domesticity, but the reality was settling in. She was the captain. She had a responsibility to more than just herself and her marriage.

She had always ended her walks here in the observation lounge, usually choosing to sit in the dark and watch the star streaks. The view was panoramic, and at this time of night there was rarely anyone to disturb her solitude. She settled herself into a chair and relaxed, closing her eyes. For two hours she’d managed not to think about the argument, but with no more helpful distractions, Lynne’s words were ringing through her head. She just couldn’t understand it—how could Lynne make those kinds of assumptions? Did they not know each other at all?

A soft footstep alerted her to another presence in the room, and she kept her eyes shut as she listened. With any luck, whoever it was would think she was sleeping and would tiptoe back out again. A twinge of guilt went through her; the lounge was open to anyone, and here she was hoping to drive another crewmember out. But the guilt wasn’t strong enough to get her to acknowledge the presence. After trade negotiations, a tour and two hours of talking to her crew, she was ready to be alone.

The intruder was either blind, totally unaware, or willfully disregarding her needs. She heard the steps come closer, followed by the sound of a body seating itself in a chair opposite her.

“That won’t work, I know you’re not sleeping.” It was Revi’s voice. “Don’t try to fool a doctor.”

Feeling more than a little disgruntled, Janeway opened her eyes. “I was hoping that whoever it was would have the grace to leave me alone.”

“Sorry. This is a public space. You want alone, go back to your quarters.”

“I can’t, I’m not alone there.” It was more than she’d meant to say, and she braced herself for the inevitable. But Revi just nodded and turned to the viewports. After several minutes, when Janeway had begun to relax again, Revi spoke up.

“Can I ask you a question about the Visconi?”

“Go ahead.” It wasn’t what she’d expected, but she wouldn’t argue with a reprieve.

“Thank you. Now, I have no agenda here, so please don’t read anything into my question. I’d just really like to know what you think.” She turned her gaze back to Janeway. “Two days ago we were injecting a shipful of Arnett to cure them from a lethal disease intentionally inflicted on them. Today we’re negotiating with the people who designed and used that same biogenic weapon. Not to save our own lives, but for time. One month of time. So my question is, do you have any ethical conflict with this situation?”

Her expression and the calm tone of her voice prevented Janeway from taking offense. She could see that Revi was truly curious.

“No,” she said. “I don’t. I learned a long time ago that I couldn’t afford to maintain a black-and-white set of ethics. Sure, I could stay out of Visconi space in ethical solidarity with the Arnett. One month isn’t that much. Until we combine it with another month down the road, and maybe two months the next time, and then where do we draw the line? Is three months a long enough time to compromise our ethics? One year? Besides, I don’t see our trade as an ethical compromise at all. I’m not enabling or endorsing the Visconi agenda in any way, and it’s possible that our trek through this area might give us the opportunity to help additional Arnett.”

Revi nodded. “That’s true. Did the Arnett come up in any of your discussions with the Visconi?”

“With the Council, definitely. I had to acknowledge their conflict and agree to stay out of it, which I did in a manner that doesn’t prevent us from offering aid, so I’m not concerned about that particular promise. I don’t think the Council even considered the possibility that we might want to offer aid, so they didn’t require me to promise I wouldn’t. But I did find it rather interesting that in the hour Lynne and I spent talking to various craftspeople and traders in the public market, nobody mentioned the Arnett. It’s as if they’re not even aware of the conflict. Then Lynne reminded me that citizens are often ignorant of their government’s actions. It’s possible the Visconi people have no idea that their government is using biogenic weapons against another race.”

“True. Interesting how often Lynne’s experiences from four hundred years ago are perfectly relevant to the current time.”

“It’s not just her experiences. She also reminded me that citizen ignorance has been around throughout written Earth history. Some things are timeless.”

“Such as the first big fight after a honeymoon. Everyone has them.”

“I wondered how long it would take you to get around to that.” But the oblique approach was a Revi trademark, curiously disarming, and she no longer found herself dreading this conversation. “Are you here to dispense useful advice?”

“Well, I don’t know how useful I can be. I can tell you that from my experience as a doctor and a friend, I’ve seen the aftermath of a few of these. They’re rarely fatal.”

“I’m not worried about it being fatal,” said Janeway. “I just wish it hadn’t happened, and I wish Lynne would have a little more trust in me, both personally and professionally. It—” She stopped, realizing that she was getting dangerously close to making herself vulnerable. Revi said nothing, merely looking at her with that calm, understanding gaze, and suddenly Janeway realized that she didn’t mind being vulnerable with her friend. Revi wouldn’t push her, and she wouldn’t take any pleasure from the revelation that Janeway was not all powerful. In fact, she thought wryly, it wouldn’t be a revelation at all, would it? Revi already knew she was human.

“It hurts,” she said finally. “It just kills me to know that Lynne honestly thinks I made her my security escort because of our personal relationship, and not because she earned it. I just don’t know how to deal with this one. It goes right to the core of who I am, and it makes me think she doesn’t really know me. And that I don’t really know her. Who the hell did I marry?”

Revi showed no reaction. “Can you tell me what happened?”

Finding herself calmed by her friend’s quiet demeanor, Janeway related the story. “So I walked out,” she concluded. “And I’m not even close to being ready to go back. I don’t know what to say to her.”

Revi’s broad smile was completely unexpected. “Kathryn,” she said, shaking her head, “how is it that you can see right through my head, and yet be completely blind when Lynne is doing the exact same thing?”

“I assume you’re going to explain that.”

“Right after you got back from your honeymoon, you took me to task for not trusting you. Except that you realized, and made me realize, that it wasn’t really you I didn’t trust. It was myself.”

Janeway stared at her. “That doesn’t make sense, Revi. She’s worked her ass off for months—her own words, by the way—to qualify for what she’s doing. She’s even earned Tuvok’s approval, which is as close as we can get here to a holy blessing. How could she do all that and still not trust herself?”

“Do you know why I chose physical medicine and not psychology?”

“I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”

Revi chuckled at Janeway’s dry tone. “Because physical medicine makes sense. If X does Y, then the predictable reaction Z occurs. It’s very logical. But our psyches aren’t in the least bit logical. They do things that don’t add up at all. Lynne’s an amazing person who seems to have adapted beautifully to her new environment. So beautifully, in fact, that I’m suspect of it. You’re the one who knows how she really thinks and feels, and you’re the only one who can help her with this. The fact that she put in all that work just to earn your respect says a lot. And if she thinks you don’t trust her skills, that might just be a confirmation of her own doubts.”

Janeway turned her gaze back to the view, and out of the corner of her eye saw Revi do the same. They watched the star streaks for several minutes before Janeway spoke again.

“Revi?”

“Hmm?”

“Have a good night. I’m heading back.” She stood up, and when Revi followed suit she impulsively reached out and hugged her.

“Thank you,” she said. “You’re a good friend.”

“You’re welcome. Now get out of here. I came here hoping for a little peace and quiet, and you’re cluttering the place up.”

Janeway waved her hand as she turned away. “I’m going.”

 

 

-----

 

 

When the door slid open Janeway stopped in her tracks. Their living area was lit solely by a dozen candles scattered throughout the room, and slow Risan jazz was playing softly in the background. Lynne had changed into her silk robe and was lying on her side on the couch, fast asleep.

“Looks like I missed the party,” Janeway whispered. Quietly she crossed the room and took a seat on the coffee table, watching her wife. Lynne’s features were peaceful; she always looked years younger when she was asleep. Feeling a wave of affection, Janeway reached out and carefully brushed a lock of hair away from her face. Immediately Lynne’s brow furrowed; then her eyes opened and she blinked drowsily at Janeway.

“Hi,” she murmured.

“Hi yourself.”

Lynne pushed herself into a sitting position and rubbed her eyes. “I waited up for you.”

“So I see. It looks like you were setting up a seduction.”

“No,” said Lynne, more awake now. “Thought I wouldn’t have minded if it had turned into that. I was actually setting up an apology. I’m sorry, Kathryn. I don’t even know what that was about.”

“It’s okay, I understand.”

“You do? Because I don’t. You’re the most professional person I’ve ever met. I know you would never have given me the job if you didn’t believe I could do it.”

Janeway reached out to take Lynne’s hands in her own. “Do you believe that you can do the job?”

“Well, Tuvok signed off on me, and you hired me, so I must be able to do it.” Lynne’s smile might have fooled someone else, but Janeway knew better.

“That didn’t answer my question,” she said gently. “Do you believe that you can do it?”

The smile faded and Lynne tried to pull her hands away, but Janeway held on.

“Talk to me, Lynne.”

She could see in Lynne’s eyes that her wife did not want to have this conversation. But she wasn’t about to let go until this was out in the open, and Lynne couldn’t pull away without making an obvious effort.

The standoff ended quickly; Lynne’s hands relaxed while she stared off over Janeway’s shoulder. Janeway waited, giving her the time she needed, and eventually Lynne’s gaze shifted back to her.

“Have you ever felt like you took on more than you could handle?” she asked.

Janeway squeezed Lynne’s hands. “Every single time I’ve accepted a new posting, and never more so than when they gave me my first ship. I was sure I’d crash and burn, and everyone would know what a failure I really was. I thought it was just a matter of luck that nobody found out.”

Lynne’s surprise was evident. “You’re kidding. I can’t imagine anybody more qualified than you to captain Voyager.”

“Well, by the time I got Voyager I’d already been captain of another ship. So it wasn’t quite the same thing. But that doesn’t mean I’m still not afraid of failure. In fact, I’m more afraid of it now, because the consequences are so much worse out here.”

Lynne said nothing to this, and Janeway knew that Revi had been right.

“Are you afraid of failing?” she asked.

Lynne dropped her head. “I’m worried that I already have,” she whispered.

“When?”

“That boy in the marketplace. I didn’t get to him before he got to you.” When she raised her eyes Janeway could read the self-censure in them. “What if he’d been more than a pickpocket, Kathryn? That didn’t even occur to me until after we got back. I didn’t see him as a real threat. You joked with Tuvok that I saved you from a small boy, but I didn’t. I failed you before I even started.”

“Oh, Lynne, you did not. Your instincts were better than mine—I didn’t see him as a threat at all, but you at least knew he was a pickpocket. If you hadn’t been there, I would have lost my tricorder—and you were right, that would have been a serious loss of technology. You did fine, Lynne. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

Despite her dark mood, Lynne snorted. “Look who’s talking. The queen of self-flagellation.”

“That just means I can recognize it better than anyone else.”

After a pause, Lynne spoke seriously once more. “I’m afraid this is all a mistake. What if I’m not good enough? You talk about consequences—if I fail it means I lose you. Voyager loses you. What the hell was I thinking? It was fine when it was all simulations and lessons with Tuvok, but now it’s for real and I’m not so sure I should be here.”

“Mm hmm. Tell me, Lynne, were you scared the first time you led a mountain climb?”

Lynne looked askance. “You’re leading me.”

“Fine, then humor me.”

“I can see where this is going, just so you know.”

Janeway nodded, acknowledging her less-than-subtle approach, but all she cared about was the outcome.

“Okay. Yes, I was scared to death. I had people depending on me for the first time. If I screwed up, people were going to get hurt.”

“So what happened?”

“Nothing.” Lynne’s body language was relaxing.

“And how long did it take you before you stopped feeling scared?”

“Never,” said Lynne. “Didn’t expect that one, did you? I’m always just a little nervous before a climb, whether it’s leading a group up a mountain or soloing a big wall. Mostly excited and exhilarated, but a little nervous at the same time. I’ve always believed the day I stopped being nervous was the day I’d get myself in big trouble.”

They looked at each other in silence, each breaking into a grin.

“Do I need to finish this conversation, or can you take it from here?” asked Janeway.

“No, it’s pretty obvious from here out.”

“Good. I think you’re ahead of the game, Lynne. You already know one of the most valuable rules: if you’re not a little bit afraid when dealing with the unknown, then you’re either an arrogant fool or an ignorant one. Either way you’re a fool. Fear has a useful purpose. Use it, let it give you a fine edge, but don’t let it beat you.”

“You should be producing inspirational vids, you know that?”

“The only person I want to inspire right now is you. Did it work?”

“It might down the road. Right now I’m still scared.”

“That’s okay. We’re not going to just talk it away. But you’ll get there, Lynne. I have faith in you.”

“That makes about one and a half of us.”

Janeway chuckled. “Then we’ll just keep working on that other half. Deal?”

“Deal.” Lynne’s expression was open and vulnerable, and Janeway realized that they’d gotten to the root of this problem far more quickly than they would have a few months ago. It wasn’t happening overnight, but they were making progress.

“Good. Can we go to bed now?” she asked.

Lynne tightened her grip. “I was just waiting for you.”

Janeway nodded and rose, bringing Lynne up with her. They went into each other’s arms automatically, each seeking a comfort they could find nowhere else. Janeway slipped a hand inside Lynne’s robe and found nothing but bare skin underneath. She moved her hand upward, cupping a warm breast.

“Thanks for waiting for me,” she whispered.

“You’re welcome. Thanks for coming back. And for knowing me so well.”

Janeway opened her mouth to say she didn’t, Revi did; but quickly decided that now was a good time to shut up. Pulling away, she took Lynne’s hand and led them around the quarters, where they took turns blowing out the candles. In the starlit dimness they walked into the bedroom.

This time, the door stayed open.

 

 

 

 

---

Chapter 17

 

 

Two days into the five-day crossing of Visconi space, Voyager ran into a fleet of Arnett ships. Seven was taking a turn at the bridge science station and reported them first; Harry confirmed a few seconds later. Chakotay called Captain Janeway in from the ready room and she appeared on the bridge almost instantly, as she usually did.

“Report,” she said as she strode to her chair. Chakotay was already stepping to his own chair, his movement unconsciously timed so they sat down together.

“Nine small Arnett ships ahead, identical configurations. Fifty-four life signs among them, six to a ship. No sign of Visconi,” said Chakotay.

Janeway checked her console and looked up. “Looks like escape pods to me. And at impulse, they’re a lifetime away from the nearest planet.”

Chakotay nodded. “That’s what I thought, too.”

“Mr. Paris, lay in a course to intercept and increase to warp eight. Janeway to Doctor Sandovhar.”

“Sickbay is preparing for casualties, Captain. The Doctor is ready to begin triage in the shuttlebay as soon as the first pods arrive.”

Janeway got an odd look on her face, and Chakotay hid a smile. Sandovhar’s arrogance was going to get her in trouble this time.

“Doctor Sandovhar,” said Janeway in that too-calm voice, “why are you making the assumption that the pods will be tractored into the shuttlebay?”

After a pause, during which the entire bridge crew held its collective breath, Sandovhar’s voice came back. “The pods are moving at impulse and likely to house a number of casualties. Voyager can’t afford to be seen by the Visconi rendering aid to the Arnett, nor can we leave them to struggle along for the next fifty years to reach the nearest planet. The most efficient means of avoiding Visconi detection, rendering aid, and getting the Arnett to a habitable planet is to tractor the pods in and resume our course and speed. Am I wrong?”

Janeway turned to look at Seven, who raised an eyebrow at her. With a strange twitch to her lips, the captain resumed her conversation. “You’re not wrong, Doctor, and I appreciate your efficiency, but I would like to at least promote the appearance of a chain of command. Perhaps next time you might wait for my order?”

“My apologies, Captain. I’ll remember that in the future.”

Chakotay schooled his face into impassivity as Janeway faced him, but inwardly he felt a satisfaction at hearing Sandovhar get slapped down. It sounded as if her appeal was starting to wear off, and Janeway’s next order only reinforced that thought.

“Chakotay,” she said quietly, “Once we get the first pod tractored in I’d like you to go to sickbay to keep an eye on the situation. Doctor Sandovhar may have her hands full with the Doctor in the shuttlebay, and I’d feel more comfortable with another senior officer on hand.”

“Certainly, Captain.” He was relieved—Janeway was finally coming around.

At warp eight it took them less than ninety minutes to reach the pods, and the refugees seemed desperately glad to hear their hail. Apparently the name Voyager had already made the rounds, and these Arnett were more than happy to accept their help. Their ship had been destroyed by the Visconi, who hadn’t bothered to chase down the escape pods, knowing that they’d never reach a habitable planet before their air ran out. Very few of the refugees had escaped injury, and several were badly hurt. The First of the destroyed ship directed Voyager to the pods with the most serious injuries, and within a few minutes they’d tractored the first one in. The Doctor called in to the bridge shortly afterwards; the injuries, though nasty, were easily treatable and the worst cases were now being transported to sickbay. At a nod from Janeway, Chakotay rose and exited the bridge.

The corridor outside sickbay was silent, and Chakotay paused before the doors, steeling himself for seeing broken bodies and people in pain. But when the doors opened, the screams that assaulted his ears were not from pain. They were from sheer terror.

The scene was surreal. Four Arnett occupied the biobeds, three of them unconscious. On the far side of sickbay, Sandovhar was poised menacingly over the fourth, her black cybernetic arm hovering over the refugee’s throat as the woman screamed in abject fear. Her panic made her words nearly incomprehensible, but the commander could pick out the words “no” and “assimilate.”

Chakotay was shocked. Certainly he’d never trusted Sandovhar, but neither had he ever thought she would actually attempt assimilation. Slapping his comm badge, he shouted, “Security to sickbay!” Looking wildly around, he realized there was nothing close to hand that he could use as a weapon. Sickbay was full of useful drugs, but he had no idea which was which, and there was no time to read labels. The only thing he had to use was his own body, and without hesitation he sprinted across the sickbay, shouting, “Doctor! Stop!”

Strangely, it worked. Sandovhar dropped a hypospray on the floor and began to back away from the biobed—straight into Chakotay. He grabbed her from behind, twisting her human arm up behind her back and doing his best to hold the cybernetic arm at her side. All he had to do was keep her occupied long enough for security to arrive, which wouldn’t be difficult since Sandovhar wasn’t fighting him.

“What the hell is going on here?” he growled. When Sandovhar neither answered nor moved, he knew she was well and truly caught. There was no mistake; she’d shown her intentions.

“So your true nature comes out at last,” he said, tightening his grip. “You’re not going anywhere, Borg.”

Sandovhar came to life. With a display of effortless Borg strength, she twisted in his grip and threw him bodily through the air. He impacted the wall with enough force to drive the wind out of his lungs, and by the time he picked himself up off the floor, she was gone.

The sickbay had gone eerily quiet, and as he fought to get air back into his lungs, he looked over to see that Sandovhar’s victim was now unconscious. Once he could speak again, he activated his comm badge.

“Chakotay to security. Doctor Sandovhar just attacked me and an Arnett refugee and has left sickbay. She is currently considered a danger to the ship. Send a team to apprehend her; I’m in pursuit.”

 

 

-----

 

 

The blast of emotion hit Seven with a force so strong that she actually staggered against the upper deck railing. Kathryn heard her and looked up.

“Seven, are you all right?”

Seven flinched and put a hand to her head. Nothing she had ever felt from Revi compared to this. It wasn’t that Revi had dropped her shields—it felt more like they had completely disintegrated. Revi’s mind was open, raw, and dysfunctional, and the primary emotions were horror and grief. Seven sent out a call through their link, but for the first time ever there was no answer at all, not even an awareness of her presence.

“Captain,” she said, “something is very wrong with Revi.” Then she winced as Revi’s emotions shifted to pure, unadulterated rage.

Before Kathryn could respond, Tuvok spoke up. “Captain, Chakotay just called for a security team to apprehend Doctor Sandovhar. He reports that she attacked both him and an Arnett refugee, then left the area. He is in pursuit.”

Kathryn’s gaze shifted back to Seven, and she knew that she was expected to rebut the report. She wished she could. “I don’t know what’s happening,” she admitted. “Revi is not responding to our link.”

“Janeway to Chakotay. Are you all right?”

“A bit bruised, but otherwise okay.” It sounded as if Chakotay were running. “She’s in the turbolift, do you know where it’s going?”

“Deck eight,” said Tuvok when Kathryn looked at him.

“Track her movements,” Kathryn ordered, “evacuate the area around her, and trap her inside a level ten force field barrier as soon as you can. Send a security team to the site.”

Tuvok nodded his acknowledgment as Kathryn addressed the Commander.

“Chakotay, report to sickbay. The Doctor will need you to point out which of the Arnett was attacked. We’ll handle Doctor Sandovhar.”

“Acknowledged.” Chakotay didn’t sound pleased, but Kathryn barely waited for him to finish before barking out more orders.

“Janeway to the Doctor. Beam yourself to sickbay immediately. Doctor Sandovhar has attacked one of the refugees; Chakotay is there waiting for you.”

“Yes, Captain.” The Doctor obviously heard Kathryn’s tone and wisely asked no questions.

“Janeway to Hamilton. Report to sickbay and prepare to assist the Doctor in any way you’re able. Also be prepared to assist security in apprehending Doctor Sandovhar should it be required.”

“Yes, Captain.” Like the Doctor, Lynne didn’t ask questions but her tone of voice indicated total disbelief.

“Tom, as soon as we get the last pod loaded, get Voyager back to normal course and speed and then I want you in sickbay as well. The Doctor is going to need all the help you can give him.” Turning even as he responded, she looked at Tuvok expectantly.

“She has left the turbolift and is proceeding down the corridor on deck eight, section ten. I’m initiating force fields…now.” He watched his board for a moment. “Doctor Sandovhar is secured, Captain.”

“Good. Stay here and monitor the situation. You have the bridge; I’m going to see about our renegade doctor. Seven, you’re with me.”

As they rode the ‘lift, Kathryn said, “Are you getting anything from her?”

Wishing she could say anything else, Seven answered truthfully. “I’m not receiving any thoughts. She is only sending pure emotion.”

“What’s she feeling?”

“Extreme anger.”

Kathryn’s facial expression did not change, and when the turbolift doors opened she led them straight to the nearest weapons locker. Quickly she pulled out two compression phaser rifles and offered one to Seven.

“I’m sorry, Seven, but Revi may leave us no choice. If she’s a danger to the crew or the ship, we have to neutralize her. I understand she’s important to you. If you don’t think you can do this, tell me now.”

Seven looked from the rifle to Kathryn’s stony face. “I’ll do my duty, Captain. But I will not require the rifle to do so. If Revi needs to be…controlled, I’ll do it personally.”

Kathryn nodded silently, secured the second rifle and led the way down the corridor. They hadn’t gotten far before they heard the sound of a force field being hit, again and again.

“Commander Sandovhar, stand down!” called a male voice.

Revi’s response was very clear. “Let me go and get the fuck away from me!”

They rounded a corner to see six security officers standing, weapons ready, on the far side of the force field trap. Revi faced the officers, only centimeters away from the humming field. Hearing their approach, she wheeled around to glare at them.

“Status, Lieutenant Parker.” Kathryn’s voice held the tone that Seven recognized as her “captain voice.” It didn’t bode well for Revi.

“The Commander is secured, Captain,” said Parker. “But she won’t stand down and she won’t stop throwing herself against the force field.”

As if goaded by his words, Revi strode the short distance to the force field separating her from Seven and Kathryn and flung herself against it. “I…said…let…me…go!” she roared, punctuating each word with another attack on the field.

Seven stepped forward and tried once again to reach out through their link, desperate to stop Revi from doing herself harm. It seemed to work; Revi ceased her attacks on the force field and stared at her instead, but her eyes held no sign of recognition. Then she shook her head irritably.

“Stop it,” she growled. “Get the fuck out of my head. I’m so sick of you being in my head. Get away from me, and let me go!” She flung herself against the force field again.

But in that brief moment, Seven had seen into Revi’s mind.

“Captain,” she said urgently, “she wishes only to go to Cargo Bay Two. Her rage is not directed toward any of us. It’s directed toward the Borg. I do not believe she will cause anyone harm.”

“Seven, she’s already attacked two people.”

“We don’t know exactly what happened, Captain. But I do know that she has no intention of harming us. If we don’t take action quickly she’s going to damage her Borg systems.”

They looked at Revi, who had switched sides and was once again throwing herself against the force field nearest the security team.

“I hope you’re right about this,” said Janeway in a low voice. Then, louder: “Lieutenant Parker, line your men up along the corridor walls. We’re lowering the force field. Be prepared to defend yourselves if necessary but do not provoke Doctor Sandovhar and do not fire without my order.”

“Yes, Captain.” A hand signal from Parker sent three men to one wall, while he and the other two stood on the opposite side.

Janeway lifted her hand to her comm badge, but it came to life before she could touch it.

“Doctor to Captain Janeway.”

“Go ahead.”

“Captain, I can’t find any evidence of injury to this patient other than what I documented upon her arrival. Apparently Commander Chakotay stopped Doctor Sandovhar before she could do any harm.”

Kathryn met Seven’s eyes. “Acknowledged. If you don’t require the Commander’s services any longer, he’s needed on the bridge. Janeway out.” She tapped her badge. “Janeway to Tuvok.”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Evacuate all personnel between here and Cargo Bay Two, and from the cargo bay as well. Erect a force field on the far side of the entrance to the cargo bay, and when that’s done drop these force fields immediately.”

“Acknowledged.”

It took an interminable twenty-eight seconds for the force fields to go down, long enough for Revi to throw herself against them six more times. Seven was growing very concerned about possible damage. But as soon as the fields dropped, Revi started down the corridor, apparently unharmed and paying no attention whatsoever to the security team. Kathryn and Seven followed close behind, while the security team formed ranks behind them.

When they reached the cargo bay, Revi walked directly to the alcove unit, waited for the door to recognize her, then stomped up to the nearest regeneration alcove and threw herself at it, screaming, “No more!” The cargo bay echoed with the sounds of cables and panels being ripped out, while electrical shorts hissed and sparked.

“I’ll repair the damage, Captain,” said Seven as they watched Revi tear the alcove apart. “I don’t believe I can reach her mind until she has expended some of this anger.” She was finding it difficult to focus; the rage flowing off Revi’s mind was astonishing in its depth. The fear and grief she had initially felt had resurfaced, but the anger was still far stronger than anything else.

“All right,” said Kathryn. “But I can’t allow her to destroy all of them. You both need them for your survival.”

“She will not,” said Seven.

But ten minutes later Revi had completely destroyed the first alcove and started on the next one, with no apparent diminishing of her rage. Seven knew she had no time left; Kathryn would not stand still much longer.

“Captain, I’m going to stop her,” she said. “She will fight me, but please do not allow anyone to shoot unless you’re certain that I’m losing. I believe that in her current condition a phaser bolt would be very detrimental to her Borg systems, including her cortical implant.”

“Seven, are you sure? You could be seriously hurt. I’ve seen her fight.” Kathryn hadn’t taken her eyes off Revi, who was bending metal with her cybernetic arm.

“I’m sure. She may have been trained by Starfleet, but I was trained by Hirogen. And as a medical/repair drone, she wasn’t programmed for combat techniques. I will not fail.”

Kathryn met her gaze, then gave one sharp nod.

Hoping that Revi’s intense focus would prevent her from seeing anything else, Seven cautiously approached her friend. If she could just get in range, she might be able to bring Revi down in one move.

She was within grappling distance when Revi whirled, bringing her cybernetic arm around in a vicious backhand. Had it connected, the arm would have dented even Seven’s reinforced skull plating, but Seven ducked the blow and stepped behind her. Revi’s momentum swung her upper body around, and before she could recover Seven lashed a kick out at the back of her right knee and a simultaneous blow to her right shoulder. The combination sent Revi twisting off her feet. She crashed to the floor, where she just had time to roll onto her back before Seven landed on top of her. Revi screamed, an animal cry of pure rage, and used all of her Borg strength in an attempt to throw off her attacker. But Seven pinned her arms and legs and held on grimly, her own strength taxed to the utmost to keep her position. Her head hurt from the screams that echoed in her mind as well as her ears.

“You fucking bastards! I won’t do this anymore! Damn you all to hell!” Revi thrashed and bucked, her fury pouring out, and Seven was hanging on with increasing desperation. Just when she thought her hold would break, everything changed. The rage burning through her mind suddenly turned into debilitating despair, and Revi went limp beneath her.

“Oh gods, please, please don’t make me do this anymore. It’s not me, it’s not me, it’s not me…” The last syllable devolved into incoherent sobbing, and Seven knew that Revi had no fight left in her. Rolling off, she pulled her unresisting friend up to a sitting position and slipped in behind her, resting Revi’s torso against her own. Rubbing her upper arms in a gentle, repetitive motion, she called her name, over and over, hoping to break through. In that final outpouring of emotion, she had caught just a few images, enough to realize that Revi was trapped in her memories and had no idea where she was.

“Revi, come back. You’re not on a cube, you’re on Voyager. You’re safe, Revi. They can’t harm you. Revi…”

She continued her assurances, both verbally and mentally, the entire processing capacity of her cortical implant focused on the limp body in her arms and the alarming lack of coherence in their mental link. Finally that link sharpened, and Revi lifted her head.

“Seven?”

Unthinkingly Seven wrapped her arms around Revi’s chest and squeezed, resting her chin on the top of her friend’s head. “Yes. It’s good to have you here again.”

Revi grasped Seven’s forearms and held on silently. Her emotions were still open, and Seven could easily see how much she required the safety of their embrace.

“Don’t worry,” she whispered. “I won’t allow anyone to harm you.”

Revi said nothing, but her grip tightened. Seven looked up then, surprised to see that the cargo bay was empty save for Kathryn, who was now unarmed.

The moment their eyes met, Kathryn stepped forward.

“Seven,” she said in a low voice, “if you need me I’ll stay; otherwise I’ll be just outside with the security team.”

Despite the gravity of the situation, Seven felt a thrill of pride. With that sentence, Kathryn had ceded control to her. She was acknowledging that Seven was the one person most qualified to resolve this issue—not a mathematical, engineering or physical dilemma, but one dealing with human emotion. Seven had often dreamed of such a time, but never had she believed it would actually arrive. However inappropriate it might be at the moment, she could not help her feelings of accomplishment. And because they were alone, and the situation seemed more personal than professional, she made a deliberate choice.

“Thank you, Kathryn,” she said. She saw Kathryn’s eyes widen at the use of her first name, but then a quick smile crossed the captain’s face. “I don’t believe that Revi would wish to have any more witnesses at this time. If you would not mind—”

“It’s okay, Seven,” said Revi. As she spoke, Seven could feel their mental connection revert to its normal strength. “I remember enough to know that there are already plenty of witnesses. And I think Kathryn deserves an explanation.”

Revi lightly pulled at Seven’s arms, and with a sense of loss Seven released her. But Revi just lifted her own arms free and then tugged Seven’s back around her waist. Tilting her head to one side, she met Seven’s eyes. “Don’t go anywhere,” she said. “I just wanted to get my arms loose.”

“I will remain here until you wish me to leave,” said Seven.

: Be careful what you promise, Seven. I may never want that. :

Seven looked at Revi in surprise, but Revi’s eyes were on the captain, who was crouching down in front of them.

“What happened, Revi?” she asked quietly.

Revi sighed. “It was one of the refugees. The Doctor had just transported the worst cases, and when I leaned over the first patient, she panicked. She saw my Borg implants and assumed that I was about to assimilate her. She screamed and pleaded with me not to hurt her—and I was in my worst nightmare.”

“Your memories,” said Kathryn.

“No, actually I mean that literally,” said Revi. “I have nightmares when I regenerate.”

“I was not aware of this,” said Seven.

“My transceiver goes dormant during regeneration. You wouldn’t have sensed it.”

“I meant that you didn’t tell me. Perhaps I might have been able to assist you.”

“I’m sorry, Seven. I didn’t want to think about it.”

Kathryn looked at the destroyed alcove, then back at Revi. “Looks like your mind took that decision out of your hands. What happens in your nightmares?”

Revi tensed and Seven felt her reluctance. After a few moments, she spoke again.

“I’m on a Borg ship, but I’m not Borg. I’m me. But I’m still hurting people, and every time I try to stop, a drone holds me there and forces me to keep going. No matter what I do, they won’t let me stop. It’s so much worse than what really happened, because in my nightmares I don’t have the excuse of being a drone. I just don’t have the ability to stop.”

“So when the refugee was afraid of you hurting her…”

Revi nodded. “I lost my grip on reality. It was so much like my nightmare. It was happening again, I was hurting an innocent person who was begging me to stop, and I just had to get away. I backed away from her and ran right into someone else, who grabbed me and held me there. I heard a voice saying that my true nature had come out and I wasn’t going anywhere, and that was when I completely panicked. I threw off the person who was holding me down and ran out of there.”

Kathryn had an expression on her face that Seven couldn’t decipher. “That was Chakotay,” she said.

“Oh, perfect,” said Revi. “The one person on Voyager who hates me the most.”

“Why do you say that?” asked Kathryn. “I know you two have your issues, but hate is a strong word.”

Revi was quiet for a moment. “I had a…meeting with him a while back,” she said. “I thought you were in your ready room, but you’d just left. Let’s just say that Chakotay took off the gloves and we both knew exactly where we stood with each other.”

“When was this?” Kathryn’s voice was very calm, but her eyes were narrowed. Seven knew the signs; someone was in trouble. She could almost feel pity for Chakotay, but he had caused Revi pain; therefore whatever Kathryn did to him would not be sufficient.

“Ten days before your wedding,” said Revi. “But Kathryn, that’s not important. I don’t want to cause any trouble between you and your first officer.”

“Don’t worry, Revi. If you can, tell me the rest of what happened today.”

Seven felt Revi’s ribs expand as she took in a deep breath.

“It gets a little fuzzy from there,” she said. “The present and past, nightmare and reality, all got mixed up in my mind and I couldn’t tell the difference. I see now that it was a classic flashback, but I wasn’t exactly thinking like a doctor at the time. I had this thought in my head that I could end it all if I could just get to the alcoves and destroy them. I wasn’t thinking of them as alcoves, though. They were just Borg technology and in my mind, they were what was holding me captive, making me do these horrible things. They were my whole focus, and I felt a blinding rage at them and the Borg. It felt good to be angry, because then I wasn’t afraid anymore. I’m always so afraid in my nightmares, so helpless. Today I was at the point where it was time to destroy or be destroyed. Either way, it was going to end.”

Revi shifted and looked up at Seven.

“Seven, when you came up behind me, I didn’t know who you were. I just saw you as another Borg trying to stop me. I’m so sorry; you know I would never hurt you intentionally.”

“Your apology is unnecessary,” said Seven. “You didn’t hurt me. I, however, am sorry that I had to hurt you.” Then she frowned as she caught a shadow of emotion from Revi, who was rapidly rebuilding her shielding but hadn’t yet gotten up to full strength.

“You are feeling guilty,” she said. “Why? You never touched me.”

Revi closed her eyes tightly, and Seven could feel her shame.

“Because…I would have…” Revi stopped, swallowed, and opened her eyes again. “I would have killed you if I could,” she whispered. “Gods, Seven, I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”

“There is nothing to forgive,” said Seven, who honestly did not see the problem. “I knew you wished to kill me; I could see it in your mind. It was irrelevant; you required my assistance.”

“You knew?” Revi pushed away from Seven and looked at her almost accusingly. “You knew and you came after me anyway? What in the hell were you thinking?”

“I was thinking that you were my friend and you needed me,” said Seven. “Was I incorrect?”

The question stopped Revi cold and she paused, considering. “No,” she said, adding quietly, “and I still do.” She closed her eyes again and allowed herself to slump back against Seven’s chest. “Gods, I’m so tired,” she murmured.

“Then I think it’s time you returned to your quarters,” said Kathryn.

“I know,” said Revi, showing no signs of movement. “I just don’t want to think about walking through those corridors right now.”

“You won’t have to,” said Kathryn. She tapped her comm badge. “Janeway to sickbay.”

“Yes, Captain.”

“No attack took place, Doctor. It was a misunderstanding. Can you do without Doctor Sandovhar’s services for a while?”

“We’re a little busy here, but with Mr. Paris and Ms. Hamilton I can handle the situation. Is she all right?”

“Yes, she is, but I’m giving her two days off if you don’t need her right away.”

“We’ll be fine, Captain. I’m glad she’s okay.”

“I’ll pass that on. Janeway out.” Kathryn grinned at Revi. “Well, that’s new. He passed up a perfectly good opportunity to make a sarcastic remark about never having needed your services in the first place.”

“We’ve been getting along much better since our little competition. It’s made my job a hell of a lot easier.”

“I can well imagine. But you have no job for the rest of today and tomorrow. I do, however, want you in sickbay sometime in the next twenty-four hours to let the Doctor take a look at you. All right?”

“Okay,” said Revi in a resigned tone.

Kathryn reached out and lightly squeezed her shoulder, then looked up at Seven. “You’re off for the same period of time,” she said. “Take care of her.” She activated Revi’s comm badge. “Computer, site-to-site transport, two to transport to Commander Sandovhar’s quarters. Authorization Janeway alpha one five six five two.”

She stepped back, and Seven watched her vanish as they were transported to Revi’s quarters. They materialized on the living room floor, neither one moving from their position.

“Well, that was nice of her,” said Revi.

“Kathryn is a very compassionate woman,” said Seven. “Still, she does not use resources lightly. I believe this transport is a reflection of her respect for you.”

“The gods only know why she would respect me after this.” Revi’s voice was hardly audible.

Seven tightened her arms around her friend. “She knows that your actions originated from a desire not to harm, a desire to end the pain you thought you were causing others. Why would she not respect that?”

Revi didn’t answer directly.

“Seven, do you respect me?”

“You should not even have to ask. Look into me and see.”

Normally, Seven felt nothing when Revi looked deeper into her mind, unless she was intentionally pulling out memories. But this time was different. With Revi’s shielding still less than fully functional, Seven saw images as their minds connected. Several were from their recent experience; others seemed unrelated—except that they all involved herself. She saw herself through Revi’s eyes, in situations both real and imagined, and was most surprised at a flash of herself and Revi kissing. The hope she’d harbored since her philosophical discussion with Kathryn and Lynne flared into full life—they had been correct. Revi was concealing her attraction, but here it was, buried beneath her shields.

The images ended, and Revi turned to look at her directly. Seven knew, from the emotions she was still sensing, that Revi was unaware of what she had inadvertently shared.

: You’re a good friend, Seven. Thank you for sticking it out with me. I know it hasn’t been easy. :

: Anything worthwhile is worth an effort. But you did not look deeply enough, Revi. There is more there than just respect. :

: Oh? What did I miss? :

Seven was glad to see that Revi’s face had lost much of its tense, drawn look. She hoped that she was doing the right thing as she leaned down and touched her lips to Revi’s.

The physical sensation was very pleasant, but it was nothing compared to the intense surge of emotion from Revi, which combined with her own feelings to make her slightly dizzy. Revi was taken by surprise, but her shock quickly changed to a warm happiness, then a sad feeling of resignation and loss. Seven drew back and looked at Revi, wincing at the sorrow so visible in her expression and her emotions.

“I’m sorry,” whispered Seven. The look on Revi’s face was causing a pain in her chest. “I did not wish to make you sad.”

“You didn’t,” said Revi, reaching up and caressing Seven’s cheek. “I’ve dreamed about you kissing me for a long time. I just never wanted you to know.”

“I saw the image in your mind. But I don’t understand. If you dreamed of this, why would you not wish me to know? I made my own feelings very clear; why have you hidden yours?”

Revi pulled her hand back, and Seven felt the loss.

“Seven, look at me. I’m fucked up. I think I gave a rather stunning demonstration of that just now. I have nothing to offer you. And I think too highly of you to let you get tangled up with the likes of me.”

Seven wasn’t sure if her own shields could have blocked her instant outrage, but she didn’t bother to raise them. Revi’s eyes widened.

: Seven… : She didn’t get the chance to finish her thought.

“You seem to be under the mistaken impression that you can control what I feel,” said Seven sharply. “You cannot. You assume that whether or not I get ‘tangled up’ with you is entirely your decision. It is not. And your assumption that you should control who I choose to be with implies that you hold the power in our relationship. You do not. And I greatly resent your assumptions.”

“Seven, that’s not—”

But she was cut off again by a very angry Seven. “If you choose not to be with me, Revi, that is your choice and your right. But you have no right to tell me that I cannot choose to be with you. It’s my decision, and your attempt to deny me that choice by concealing your own feelings was both wrong and hurtful. I will not tolerate that presumption. Do you understand?”

Revi had shrunk away, her shoulders hunched as if warding off a blow. “Seven, please!” she cried.

The desperation in her voice stopped Seven, who finally took a moment to listen to the thoughts running through her friend’s mind. With a start she realized that Revi was barely retaining her mental coherence. Her anger vanished, instantly replaced by remorse. She pulled Revi back against her chest and wrapped her arms around her waist.

: I’m sorry. This was not an appropriate time for me to express my frustration. Please forgive me; I was being selfish and inconsiderate. :

The mental connection seemed to stabilize Revi. She lifted her head, letting it fall back against Seven’s shoulder.

: It’s okay, Seven. I’m just really tired, and I can’t deal with this right now. Please, can we talk about this later? :

: Yes, of course. : Now Seven was angry with herself. She had just expended a great deal of effort preventing anyone else from hurting Revi—for what? So she could complete the task herself?

: Don’t beat yourself up over it. I’m just—exposed right now, and I don’t have any defenses left. Okay? :

: I understand. : Seven still felt remorseful.

: Stop it, Seven. I’m all right. Will you help me up? :

Carefully, Seven stood and pulled Revi up with her. : Do you wish to regenerate? :

: No. I don’t want anything to do with those alcoves right now. I just want to sleep. In a real bed. Revi turned to face her. : Kathryn knew that before I did. I just realized that. :

: Kathryn is a very perceptive woman. :

Revi reached out and took Seven by the hand. : So are you. You knew what I needed back there. Thank you for taking care of me. :

Seven looked down at her friend, so quiet and withdrawn. She wanted nothing more than to continue taking care of her.

Revi smiled, catching her thought. : Would you think me selfish if I said that right now, I want that too? :

: No. :

: Then will you come with me? :

Seven nodded and Revi turned, tugging her by the hand. She led them through the living quarters to the bedroom, where she let go of Seven’s hand, tugged off her jacket and dropped it to the floor. Her boots soon followed, and she climbed onto the bed, turning over on her back and closing her eyes with a sigh. Seven looked at the discarded clothes on the floor and frowned. Such untidiness was aberrant to Revi’s nature and a strong indicator of her exhaustion. She stood still, watching the prone form on the bed, unsure of what was expected of her. After a moment Revi’s eyes opened and she looked straight into Seven’s. An image shimmered in Seven’s mind, and without hesitation she pulled off her boots, draped her jacket over the chair, and lay down next to her friend. Revi rolled to her side and rested her head on Seven’s shoulder, sighing again when Seven wrapped her arm around her back and pulled her in close, using her other hand to caress Revi’s hair.

: Thank you, Seven. I really needed this. :

: You’re welcome. Sleep now. :

: Will you stay? :

: I’ll watch over you. You are safe. :

Revi’s response was incoherent, and Seven was mesmerized by the workings of her friend’s mind as she fell asleep. She had never experienced this before. When Revi regenerated, her thoughts were abruptly cut off as she entered a cycle and just as abruptly came back on line when the cycle was completed. But this process, this human version of regeneration, was different. Revi’s thoughts seemed to wind down, becoming increasingly random. Her emotional guard dropped entirely, but her emotions were also random and muted. It was as if Revi’s brain had simply run out of fuel and was slowly coming to a halt.

No, thought Seven as she looked down at Revi’s relaxed features. Not a halt. More like an energy-saving level of operation, running at minimal power until the full systems should be needed once again. Revi was now completely asleep, but Seven could still hear activity in her mind. Nothing she could decipher, just a kind of mental hum.

She let her head relax on the pillow and settled in. She didn’t know how long Revi would need her, but however long that might be, she would be right here.

 

 

-----

 

 

Janeway watched Seven and Revi shimmer out of sight, her hopes high for their future relationship. Revi had finally reached out for Seven, and Seven had taken care of her as if she’d spent her life nurturing others. If this didn’t break Revi out of her self-imposed emotional exile, nothing would.

She exited the cargo bay and stopped, momentarily startled to see the security team waiting outside. She’d nearly forgotten about sending them out earlier.

“The situation has been resolved,” she said crisply. “It is to be considered classified at this time. Thank you for your efforts. You may return to your duties.”

“Yes, Captain,” said Lieutenant Parker. He turned to his team. “Let’s go.” Janeway watched them move off, murmuring amongst themselves as they walked. They could talk to each other all they wanted, but none of them would breathe a word about what they’d seen. Labeling the mission as classified meant that no one else save Tuvok would learn of it. It was the least she could do for Revi, who was obviously humiliated that so many had witnessed her breakdown. Then she tallied all of the others who would have to be notified of the classification, and suspected it might be a lost cause. Still, it was worth a try.

 

 

 

 

---

Chapter 18

 

 

The pods had been successfully tractored in, Tom and Lynne were in sickbay helping the Doctor, and Tuvok was dealing with refugee placement. Chakotay was on the bridge, freeing Janeway to retire to her ready room to find out exactly what the hell had happened that morning. She hadn’t shared Revi’s story with Chakotay, wanting to collect all possible data before speaking with him. All he knew was that the situation was resolved and she would fill him in later. And now she was attempting, not all that successfully, to calm herself down.

She’d called up the security logs from sickbay and watched the encounter between Revi and the refugee. Everything had taken place as Revi had recounted it—she had never even touched the woman. But Chakotay’s actions had stunned her. He couldn’t have played into Revi’s nightmares more accurately even if he’d known about them. It was no wonder that Revi had snapped.

Next she had run a search through the security logs from her ready room, locating the log from the day Revi and Chakotay had spoken together. She’d just finished viewing it and was absolutely furious. Forcing herself to wait another five minutes, she eventually got to the point where she was reasonably certain her voice would not betray her. Only then did she call Chakotay into her ready room.

“Chakotay,” she began when he had taken his seat, “I’ve been trying to piece together what happened in sickbay. Exactly what did you see?”

He sat back in his chair. “When I entered sickbay, only one of the refugees was conscious and she was screaming. Doctor Sandovhar was standing over her, clearly preparing to assimilate her, and the woman was begging for her life. I called security and engaged Doctor Sandovhar. She ceased her assimilation efforts, threw me into a wall and disappeared. That’s the last I heard of her until you told me the situation was resolved.”

“Did you say anything to Doctor Sandovhar during this encounter?”

“Yes, I ordered her to stop and she did.”

“Anything else?” Come on, Chakotay, tell the truth.

He shifted in his chair. “Not that I can recall.”

Janeway drummed her fingers on her chair, the only outward sign of her anger.

“I just finished watching the security log. Knowing that, would you care to revise your story? Because I believe you did say something else. In fact, let me quote it for you. You said, ‘So your true nature comes out. You’re not going anywhere, Borg.’”

He looked a little embarrassed. “Yes, I do recall saying something like that, but Kathryn, it’s not like it wasn’t the truth. I caught her in the act of assimilation, for god’s sake.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“Of course I’m sure!” Now he was offended, and not doing a good job of hiding it. “It’s not an easy thing to mistake.”

“If she was reverting to Borg, why would she have been so frightened?”

His mouth dropped open. “She wasn’t frightened. She threw me into a wall, remember? I’m the one who got hurt.”

She reset the security log to a specific time index, paused the playback, and swiveled it to face him. He looked at the scene of himself holding Revi by the arms as she was twisting around.

“Look at her face, Chakotay. What do you see?”

He raised his eyes. “She does look afraid.”

“Actually, she was terrified. Look again.”

He did. “Well, I guess she knew she was in trouble. She was attacking the refugee and I caught her.”

“And how do you know she was attacking the refugee?” Janeway’s voice was very low.

“Because I saw it. Didn’t you just ask me this?”

“No, before I asked if you were sure about the assimilation. Now I’m asking if you actually saw an attack.”

“I caught her in the act!”

“Did you speak to the refugee? Ask her what happened?”

“She passed out, and none of the other refugees were conscious. There was no one to talk to.”

“No one except Doctor Sandovhar. But you didn’t talk to her, you just accused her.”

He stiffened. “Why are you grilling me? I’m not the one who betrayed her captain and crew.”

“No,” she said, “you just betrayed your position and my trust in you.”

That plainly stunned him. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about your complete inability to let go of your judgmental attitude toward Doctor Sandovhar, despite my direct order to not let it affect your professional behavior. I’m talking about the second-in-command of this ship openly telling a Starfleet commander that he’s waiting for her to make a mistake and that she has no right to access her captain.” Now she allowed a little of her anger to show through, and he visibly shrank in his chair. “I’m talking about my first officer allowing his prejudices to affect his professional judgment to such an extent that he endangers the ship’s CMO, a security team, the captain and oh yes, let’s not forget the astrometrics officer, who put herself in considerable personal danger this morning in an effort to undo the mess you caused.”

He looked at her as if she’d lost her mind. “What mess? She was committing a crime, and I was there to stop it because you sent me down there to watch her! Why is my distrust unprofessional and yours is apparently just healthy caution?”

That stopped Janeway cold. “Is that why you think I sent you down there? Because I didn’t trust her?”

“Wasn’t it?”

It took her a second or two to fight down the surge of anger. “No,” she said, her voice belying the effort required to speak calmly. “I sent you because I’ve been all too aware of your continuing inability to get past your prejudices, and I thought it would be good for you to see Doctor Sandovhar working in her element. There’s a reason I made her CMO, and I hoped if you saw her in action you might start to understand. Chakotay, she was doing her job. She was not committing a crime, and she didn’t attack you. You attacked her and she acted in self-defense.” He tried to interrupt, but she gave him no time. “The situation you walked in on was explosive and needed careful handling. Not only did you not handle it in a careful manner, but when you allowed your personal prejudices to influence your professional behavior you made it much worse. You gave us incomplete information, and based on that information I put a security team in harm’s way and also endangered Doctor Sandovhar and Seven of Nine. If Seven hadn’t been with me, the situation would have ended with Doctor Sandovhar being taken by force. And that’s what you wanted, wasn’t it?”

“What I wanted was the safety of the ship and crew, Kathryn,” he said. She immediately held up her hand, grinding her teeth together.

“Chakotay, we are not on a first-name basis right now. I reserve that for people who have earned my respect, and you lost that today.”

That, more than anything else, seemed to get through. He sat back in his chair slack-jawed.

Janeway reset the security log once again, this time to the point before the refugees were beamed in, when Revi was still alone in sickbay. She hit the playback without a word.

The log was recorded from an angle that clearly showed Revi’s movements, and it was obvious that she was in the act of calmly lifting a hypospray to the refugee’s throat when the screaming began. There was no attack.

When the playback ended, the only sound in the room was their breathing. Chakotay didn’t meet Janeway’s eyes for several seconds. When he finally looked up, his expression was one of total confusion.

“I don’t understand, then. Why was she screaming? Doctor Sandovhar didn’t even touch her.”

“She was screaming,” said Janeway quietly, “because she was viewing Doctor Sandovhar with the exact prejudices that you hold. A reasonable reaction, considering that she didn’t know any better. But you did, Chakotay. Or at least you should have. Instead, you allowed your personal distrust to interfere with the performance of your duty, and caused a dangerous situation in the process. Doctor Sandovhar was experiencing a flashback to her days as a Borg drone, and as the first person on the scene you had the ability to minimize that situation. Instead, you made it worse. I can’t tell you how much worse without betraying the doctor’s confidence, but suffice to say that I am now worried about her recovery. And I am very, very disappointed in you.”

He flinched.

Janeway eyed him for a moment before sitting up straight in her chair. “Commander Chakotay, for unprofessional conduct and for actively endangering your fellow crewmembers, I am relieving you of duty and confining you to quarters for ten days.” His eyes flashed up, shocked, as she continued. “Be glad I’m not throwing you in the brig. You can consider the light sentence a testament to your past job performance, but you’re on probation now. You’ll have to earn back my trust and my belief in you. I cannot have a first officer who can’t discharge his duty fairly.”

He maintained their eye contact, but plainly it was costing him some effort.

“I suggest you spend some of that time reflecting on your behavior and the harm you may have caused a valuable member of our crew. Your sentence is effective immediately.” She paused, her anger finally getting the better of her. “Now get out.”

Chakotay seemed rooted to his chair, but her hard glare broke him loose. Without a word, he got up and left.

 

 

 

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